The Idiot Team Squad
by brooksideup
Summary: Feliciano Vargas and Romano Vargas go through unforgettable experiences with the Allies, while trying. I repeat, trying to be a mafia team. Of course there are some boo-boo words, because of Romano and perverted things because of France. I don't own Hetalia.
1. The letter

It was another beautiful day, and Romano was picking his precious tomatoes at the back of his garden. _It sure is nice without having any of those fucking bastards around… now I can pick my tomatoes in peace….Wow, Mario! You have grown so much! So plump and red! But Luigi is still green…Now, what should I do wi-_

"Ve~fratello! Fratello! We received a letter! It is very pretty! Look-a at those gold borders and-" The usually hyper Italian was running towards his older brother until he tripped and fell._ Oh, God. Why._

"Just gimme that, bastardo! God, you can be such a pain in the ass som- _every _time…It must be from our boss or something, probably about another world meeti-ehh? ? ?"

"Owie….Hm…fratello are you ok what is it! What is it!"

"…"

"Ve~fratello I'm not patient hurry up what is it~"

"We…"

"HUH?"

"LEMME FINISH GODDAMMIT. WE HAVE A LITTLE BROTHER!" Both of the Italians stayed silent for couple of minutes, trying to process the words that floated around them. _We have a little brother. We have a little brother. We have a little brother._

Both of the brothers sat down on the tomato-filled field, thinking about what they should do. At least Romano did. _Dammit….how is Feliciano going to react_? _Is he going to cry_? _FUCK he's staring at me shit shit shit shit shit shit shit what now_? _What do I say to him_? _FUCK he opened his mouth -_

"…Does he like pasta?"

"…WHAT?"

"I said, fratello, if our little brother liked pasta…."

"WE HAVE A SERIOUS ISSUE HERE AND THE ONLY THINK YOU COULD THINK OF IS IF HE LIKED PASTA? IDIOT!"..._Oh damn. He's going to cry... Shit. What now_? "Uh. We..We're going out. Let's go."

"Yay! Where? " Feliciano dried his tears with his hand and went back onto his happy mode again.

"To that bastard's house." _How can he change his mood so fast?_

"Big brother Spain?"

"No, not that one." _Why does he have to remind me of that tomato bastard_? _I forgot that I was supposed to go to his house today. Oh well._

"Germany?"

"Not him too, besides, I call him the potato bastard." _Wow. Now that fucking potato rapist. Oh I was supposed to research on something for him. Oh well._

"Boss? Prussia? America? England? France? Austria? Hungary? Russia? China? Kor-" _OH FUCK IT._

"NO! TO OUR LITTLE BROTHER'S!"

"Ah…I get it. Okay. Okay. So Romano, what is his name?" _His name_?..._What was it again_? _Ah._

"Se…Seborga."

"SEBORGA? What a beautiful name! I like it! Uhh do we know something else about him?"

"No." _That's right. I don't know anything about him._ Feliciano and Romano got into Romano's car, and started driving towards their mysterious little brother.

"Hm…so what about we guess how our little brother is? I think he loves pasta, and I don't think he will be as good with girls as us! I think he will love Germany as me and-"

"Wait, wait WHAT? No. I think he will be smarter than you, at least. His name sounds like it. He will prefer pizza than pasta, and yea I think we'll be better with girls than him. Heh. And no way in hell he's going to like that potato man. If he had to choose, he would prefer the tomato pedo. Got that?"

"…Hmm..Romano, what if he's as perfectionist as Germany? Or what if he is as bad tempered as you? Or what if he is as annoying as Sealand? Or as hyper as America? Or a pervert like France?"

"Calm down, dammit. He is going to be a perfect little brother ok? He's not going to be like any of those fucking nations got me?"

"Fratello…"

"WHAT."

"What if he's like Belarus?" Romano freezed and stopped the car on it track right away. A couple of other drivers cursed and gave him the finger, but he didn't mind. _Holy fucking shitty shit. What if he is. Li..like Be…Belarus. What if he loves us too much . _Romano forgot about that thought, or tried to, and got back on track. Feliciano didn't really mind that sudden break because he was used to that with him driving. The trip wasn't that long, it took about 30 minutes, and by then, the two brothers thought of Seborga as a possible rapist-cook-scary-as-hell-strict-smart-not-flirt-weird-short brother.

"Well…this is it. We fucking arrived."

"Ve~ I'm nervous fratello."

"Well don't be. Let's go."

**Damn dividing thing**

Seborga's house was a little smaller than the two brothers', but it looked very, uh, homey. It had a small red door, and various windows in the front. The house was a light brown, and its garden was full of flowers and trees. _Maybe he loves the nature._ Romano went towards the door and knocked on it twice. Nobody came, so he just opened the door, which was unlocked. The interior was better than he thought it would be. Although the outside of his house was all nature-like, the inside of it was modern, with weird shapes and clean. Very clean. Still, nobody came, so Romano looked at the giant white clock on the wall. _3 o' clock. Time for our siesta. _

"Hey, Feliciano, how about we-" Feliciano was already on the black couch, sleeping and snoring lightly. _Wow. How can he sleep like that_? Romano went over to his brother and lied down beside him, since the couch was huge enough for at least three people. As soon as he lied down, Romano just knocked out. Little did he know that the owner of the house had seen everything.

**Hello! So I know this chapter is pretty short and confusing and bad, but there are more chapters that I'm pretty done with, and this chapter was kind of rushed, so please forgive me! Hmm...let's see...uh...the Nordics will eventually appear, the Allies, and some of the Asians. There are going to be slight pairings, but not so...'ruff' Heh. Hmm..okay I think I'm pretty much done with this lame talk. Ok! Please read the following chapters! Oh I forgot. This fan fic isn't going to be nothing serious, it's mostly how the nations are going to act stupid, uh, in other words, it's going to be more humor. If there is any. You know what, I'm confused myself with this talk so I am going to stop now. Really. Bye~ Thanks for reading!**


	2. Meeting Seborga

Seborga just came back from the meeting with Wy, and saw his door open already. _Oh damn…Did some girl come back for something_? _Who did I hang out with...Julia, Jennifer, Janie, who was it again_? _Oh well, I'll just say that I'm leaving for Wy. She won't even know where that is….huh_? The little micro-nation set his eyes on the couple lying on his couch. _Did I hang out with men yesterday_? _And twins_? _They look familiar tho..._ Seborga went over and studied the two strangers on his couch. _Well, they're pretty cute…they look so peaceful… I should wake them up. _

"Hey…hey mister? Wake up...hey..." Seborga managed to wake Romano up, who got so surprised that he hit his head with Seborga and nearly pissed himself.

"OW! SHIT! I NEARLY PISS MY SELF! WHO ARE YOU?"

"Uh…I think I should be the one asking that."

"….Se…Seborga?"

"Yes?"

"BROTHER!" Romano opened his arms to welcome a hug. However, Seborga just stared at him and stayed in the awkward silence for a couple of minutes. He eventually stood up and got his phone, then started dialing a number on it. "Hey! What are you doing?" Romano finally gave up his hug, a little bit hurt, but not that he'll ever admit that.

"Just a minute."

"Fine! By the way, I am Romano, and this is Feliciano, who is still sleeping, and WAKE UP, BASTARDO! And we are your older brothers and-"

"Oh yes, hello? Is this the police? Yes, so there is this lunatic here that thinks that I am his brother and he barged into my hou-" Romano tackled his younger brother and snatched the phone off him.

"Oh yes. No need to come. He was just kidding." The tan Italian turned off the phone and pinned his brother down. "THE FUCK? WHY DID YOU CALL THE POLICE?"

"Well, I don't really know you and you come into my house and sleep on my couch and then you say "BROTHER!" And yea." The two men just stared at each other until Romano got off him.

"Well, uh. Uh. How do I start? OH! The letter." Romano handed out the letter he had received from his boss to his little brother.

"What is this….Oh hey! I got this letter too! Brother!" The two men stared at each other in silence once again, one with happiness, and one with the I-am-not-amused look.

"So you're as stupid as Feliciano, huh?"

"Hmmm? Who is that? Oh is that your lover there?"

"He…He is not my lover! He is my fucking brother! Your brother! The fuck! And why woul- WAKE THE FUCK UP, FELICIANO!" Romano blushed and threw a pillow at Feliciano.

"Ve~ Germany?" Feliciano sat up and rubbed his eyes, while looking at the two people who were staring at him. "Romano? Did you duplicate yourself?" As the two other Italians heard that, they face-plamed and went over to the stupid Italian.

"No, stupid. He is Seborga. Our brother. You know? The reason why we came here?" N. Italy just stood there with a blank face until he finally processed what his older brother said.

"OHHH! Hi! I am Feliciano, N. Italy! And this is our big brother Romano! He is S. Italy! His real name is Lovino, tho! We are the Vargas brothers! So you are tooooooooo~~~"

"Oh, my real name is Marcello! Do you guys want something do drink or something?"

"Yes!"

"Whatever."

"Okay. Be right back."

The Italian trio kept talking for hours and hours, while Feli ate some gelato, Lovino drank tomato juice, and Seborga ate some cake. They were all having fun at the small coffee table, while watching some Italian movies.

"So, are you good with girls?" Feliciano asked, raising his eyebrows seductively.

"Hahahah! The best!"

"Pff. Stop fucking lying."

"Hold on." Seborga stood up and went to his room. He soon came back with various women underwear and bras, and set it up o n the table. "That was Natalia's. She was damn good. That was Jaquey's. Pretty good too, but like 6 out of 10. Oh, this one was Marceline's. She was a big girl, but one of the best. And-"

"HOLY SHIT! Why do you have all this?"

"The girls wanted me to keep it. For me remember them. And believe me, I do really. Hahahaha. So, who is bad with girls now?" The Italian nations found filled with amusement and a bit of jealousy, and all concluded that Seborga was indeed the best one out of them.

"Uh….I don't have those….I'm still a virgin." Feliciano said, as he looked down.

"Don't fucking feel bad! It's all right bastard. As long as you don't do it with the potato bastard or anything."

"Awe….but Romano…I wanted him to be my first…"

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?" Romano said, while choking his younger brother.

"Hey, hey calm down! How about we go out to eat!" Seborga managed to separate the North and South and kept a note to himself to never set his guard down when Romano is around.

"Okay!"

"So..what should we fucking eat, bastard?"

"Uh….what do you guys want to eat?"

"PASTA~"

"I hate pasta." Romano and Feliciano froze and stared at Seborga for the longest time. "What? Is something on my face?" Feliciano started crying, while Romano got into his brother's throat. "The fuck? Get off me!"

"HOW CAN YOU HATE PASTA, GODDAMMIT! YOU'RE ITALIAN! Fratelli d'Italia, L'Italia s'è desta , Dell'elmo di Scipio-"

"I just hate it! And why are you singing the national anthem? Get off meeeheheheeeeee~"

"My brother. Hates pastaaaaaa!"

The room was a chaos, and all three of the brothers were screaming, one crying and whining, one cussing and singing his national anthem, and one trying to get off his brother's grip. "Okay! Fine! Let's go eat your goddamn pasta!" The two older brothers stopped and smiled, then got up and entered Romano's car right away. "What are you doing? Let's just cook here!" The Italies got off the car and entered the house again, then got into the kitchen. The kitchen was enormous, and it looked like a kitchen just form a magazine. It was gorgeous.

"So, what will you cook for us?"

"Aren't you guys good at cooking? I am one of the worst cooks ever. I can't cook." The room went into chaos once again, Feliciano crying and whining about his little brother that can't cook, and Romano screaming all the Italian cooks onto Seborga's face. Everything stopped when all three's stomach grumbled in unison. "Heh. At least we have something in common now, huh?" Romano got off his brother, and started cooking with Feliciano, who finally stopped crying.

When dinner was done, The table was filled with delicious foods, (including pasta) and the trio gobbled up until they were absolutely filled. Later, they cleaned the table, and watched some news.

"So….why do you think the boss told us to meet? And why we didn't know about each other?" The micro-nation asked, while indulging his mint gelato.

"I don't know…do you know Romano?" The middle brother said, while licking his strawberry gelato.

"Hm…I know that we just discovered we had a little brother recently. Including our boss. And…there is something else I forgot to tell you." Now, the other two were paying close attention. "We…there is a reason why we were gathered together again."

"Well, what is it, Romano?"

"We…we're going to be a mafia team."

**hehehehh I know, I know. This chapter sucks. I know. But uh, they meet Seborga! And I didn't make him as bubbly as Feliciano or as grumpy as Romano. He's in the middle. I have to say, I didn't really read the chapter to edit, so there must be some mistakes and confusing parts. Because I'm confusing by nature. Damn nature. Uh, thank you for reading, I love you very very much and I'm going to eat some ice cream now. Bye!**

**Oh yes. Read the next chapter or else I'll strangle you  
**

**Just kidding. You know I love you.  
**

**I don't own Hetalia. Seriously.  
**


	3. The Allies and the first mission

"A...a mafia team?" The younger brothers said in unison.

"Yeah, yea. The boss told me because he didn't trust Feliciano to remember and neither Marcello, because he probably has the same memory as Feli. Shitty. And we have to know our weaknesses and strength, we also have a mission already." Romano turned off the tv, and turned to his brothers. "Did you guys get it?"

"Uh, sorry I was into that movie. The girl was pretty hot and-" Romano threw the tv remote at Seborga.

"MARCELLO! PAY THE FUCKING ATTENTION! DID YOU GET IT FELICIANO?"

"Ve! Uh…no."

Romano explained it all over again about two times until the duo finally got it. Sort of. "Now let me tell the first mission. We have to get an underground team. And we have the choices of, the Nordics, the Asians, or the Allies. Who the fuck do you want?"

Marcello chose the Nordics, Feliciano chose the Allies and Romano chose the Asians. "Fuck. How are we supposed to do this?" The trio ended up deciding wih rock-paper-scissors, and Feliciano won. "Yea, yea. Let's contact the Allies. Ugh Feliciano was always good with games." Romano called America first. "Uh..hello?"

"Hello? Hey Romano is that you?"

"Uh….HOLD ON!" Romano passed the phone to Feliciano, who happily talked to America, explaining what was going to happen.

"Why did you pass the phone?" Seborga sat by Romano, raising an eyebrow.

"I…I got nervous." Marcello laughed so hard he was rolling on the floor. "WHAT? I'M FUCKING SHY SOMETIMES. ESPECIALLY WITH MEN!"

"PFFFFF you got nervous? Hahaha! I thought you were the better flirt!"

"I am! But just because I know I won't see them again! And uh I have to see the nations a hell of a lot!" Romano turned bright red and tried avoiding looking at this youngest brother.

"Yeah yeah whatever. So who are the Allies?"

"America, England, Russia, China, France."

"Russia and France? Are you sure?"

"Well damn Feliciano for always winning the game stuff. But whatever. We have….." Romano tried to think of a useful nation. "We…uh..CHINA! And sometimes England! I've heard that he can really shoot when he is drunk. And America is strong! Alright. Done?"

"Yea. Sure."

"You know I think you're the only one that can talk like that to me without getting a broom stuck in your ass."

"Thank..you?"

"You're welcome bastardo."

"Ve~Lovino! Marcello! They agreed! Let's meet them right now!"

"RIGHT NOW?" The Italian Brothers got up and drove to their destination. Panda Panda Land.

"Why do we have to come in this gay place?"

"Ve~Lovino~You're gay for Antonio"

"NO I AM NOT! AND DON'T FUCKING CALL ME LOVINO! CALL ME ROMANO. R.O.M.A.N.O."

"Yes, yes."

All three went over to the table where the allies were, and sat down. "Alright, dudes! We are all here! So! What should we do?"

"Let's order our roles. What are your strengths?"

"I am as strong as Captain America! And I can shoot pretty well, since I had the 2nd Amendment!" America punched the air as he jumped in excitement.

"So you be our main sniper."

"Awe…but it's boring…'

"Shut up. What about you, England?"

"I'm good at organizing stuff. But I can get violent when drunk. But I am drunk so I don't have coordination. So I need someone by me if we're going to use me when drunk."

"Alright. So you're going to be the one that contacts all of us about boss and our enemies."

"Sure."

"Hm…Russia?"

"I'm pretty Strong, da?"

"Okay, so you are in charge of intimating our enemies as too."

"Alright."

"China?"

"Hmm...I can cook, I know martial arts, and I have various contacts because of my China towns everywhere aru. I also know a lot about other people. Oh, and...I can cross-dress pretty well…"

"So you can be our spy. And seducer."

"Se…seducer? O…Ok aru."

"Shit….what about you, France."

"Oohohohohon. I am very, very, romantic, I attract a lot of attention, I can cook, and I am sexy!"

"Damn….you be the…uhh..fucking distractor. Okay?"

"Oh sure, mon ami!"

"Let's see...Feliciano. You..oh fuck. You can be the team's helper. Help in any way we want, ok? But it depends if it's France. Understand?"

"Do I have to kill anyone?"

"It depends."

"Uh….ok…I'll be the helper."

"Marcello. You are a damn good flirt, almost as France. But I bet you can shoot, huh? And I saw you dangling out on the trees. You can be the assassin."

"Okay."

"And I'll be the leader. Because I have the most experience. And I can fucking shoot. So I kill too. Do we all understand here?" Everyone nodded. "Alright. Now lemme tell you guys our first mission." All the nations paid close attention this time. "We have to get Switzerland to be in our side, so we can have his guns. But as you know, he is a neutral guy, which is fucking annoying, so it won't be that easy. Oh yea, and we need our 'special' names. I got that part."

**Divide~ **

"Okay. Are you all ready? We are currently in Liechtenstein, and since the name is too fucking hard for me, I'm just going to say Li. We have to pass through Li so we get to Switz. Hey, Sir Eyebrows. Where is Li right now?" Romano pressed against his miniature Bluetooth for him to hear better.

"Okay. Do I seriously have to have that bloody name? Anyways. She is currently watering her flowers in front of Switz's house. There is no other way in getting in his house other than pass through her, since he has bombs at the windows if somebody breaks them. "

"Shit…hey, Wine Frog. You think you can seduce her?"

"Mon dieu, why do I have zis name? Anyways…I zon't zink I can, Switz told Li to stay away from me, and she is very very obedient!"

"Uh, fine. Hey Female Panda. Are there any other beings around?"

"I AM A GUY! And yes, there are some maids aru, like two of them. We should probably get rid of them, aru."

"Okay. Wine Frog and Ketchup Lingerie. You guys make those maids get all over you and get out of the fucking way. Do it silently. Don't let Li notice."

"Yes! But why is Marcello Ketchup Lingerie?"

"He loves ketchup and the other part…well…JUST FUCKING GO! WE DON'T HAVE TIME!"

"Okay! Going! Hey Ketchup! I get the one with the nice ass!"

"No fair!"

"GO GODDMMIT!" The two flirts went, and in just 3 minutes, the maids went to get laid.

"Alright. Now we only go Li. We have to be quick until she notices that the maids are gone. Hello. Captain Fat? Can you look into Switz's house with tour sniper? Are there any more people there?"

"Hey! Totally not cool! Why Captain Fat! I mean I like the Captain part but not the Fat part!"

"How much do you weight?"

"…Nobody else is in the house."

"OK. Flag Idiot, go talk to Li. Be friendly and ask if she wants to go out or something. "

"Ve~Yes, fratello!" Flag Idiot went, and although it took some time, Li actually went out with Feliciano, and all was clear."

"Now we have to get into the house. Female Panda, examine the door, and open it with precision."

"Alright, aru." Female Panda carefully opened the door, and quickly went in. "Switz is not in the living room. Where is he, Captain Fat?"

"Hmm…I can't find him with my sniper. Ask Sir Eyebrows."

"My computer says that he is in his study room. It I upstairs, 3rd room at your right. Oh and Tomato Leader, can I turn Frog's and Lingerie's Bluetooth off? I hear their moans and grunts. And the Frog is saying some….things."

"No, they have to know everything that is going on. Just bear with it."

"Ohohohohon…so you want be to enter you in any way?"

"You know what, turn them off."

"Oh, thank you."

"Ok. So here is the plan. Female Panda will enter Switz's room, and try to convince him. If it doesn't work, Vodka Pipe goes in, and intimates him. Everyone, do you understand?" Everyone agreed. "Alright. Proceed."

As Female Panda went in the room, a couple of gunshots were heard. Later, Female Panda called Vodka Pipe, and he did a pretty good job an intimating, since Switz ran for his life. "Shit. Hey, Tomato Leader, he bloody ran. He is going towards-Uh, he collapsed. Captain Fat, did you shoot him?"

"Yeah, but I just made him asleep. Don't worry. What now?"

"We fucking convince him."

**Divide~**

"NO! I WON'T HELP YOU!" The blonde spat as he screamed, while struggling to get out of the chair, which was tied with him.

"Why the fuck not?" Romano sat in front of Switzerland, then swiped off the blonde's spit on him.

"I am neutral!"

"Sigh…we have Liechtenstein." Romano remained calm, since he didn't want too much trouble.

"WHAT?"

"She is with France."

"WHAT?"

"In a fucking room. And if you say 'what' again, I will let him do whatever he wants." The older Italian was getting impatient as always.

"LET HER GO! WITH FRANCE? HOW IS SH-" Sqitzerland freaked, as he desperately tried to get out of the damn chair, but to no avail.

"Ve~fratello! We came back! Li was pretty fun to be with and-" Every nation stared at Feliciano as he entered with Liechtenstein while eating an ice cream. "Is something wrong?"

"BASTARDO! DIDN'T YOU HEAR ANYTHING I SAID?"

"Well, France was moaning too much that I decided to turn off, and-"

"So my little sister is with France, huh?" Switzerland smiled as his anger built up, making every one in the room tense.

"Whatever, the fact is, that if you don't join us, we will really keep that Li right there."

"…..And what would you give me in return if I accepted?"

"Your sister, duh."

"And?"

"I have some of naked Austria's pictures an-"

"OK!"

The nations stared at Switz, who blushed hard and tried avoiding their surprised gazes. "It…It's not what you think! I…I just!"

"Oh…so that's why you say his name while you dream….and your breathing gets all weird big brother…"

In the end, Switzerland agreed to be in the team's side, however, the team had another mission that they needed to do.

**You know what I noticed? I end my chapter really bad. And start them really bad. And write them really bad. But anyways, I'm writing this because this has been in my mind, when I saw a grandpa at the park eating peanuts...Hm, the Allies come in! And Switzerland! Oh, and if you got offended because I called him Switz, I'm sorry. it's because I am too lazy to write the whole name. Please don't kill me. Oh yes, so the reason why I uploaded this many chapter in one day is because I had these stories in my computer but I didn't upload them because I didn't know how. PFFFF I'm so stupid. Okay hope you're liking this. I really do. Thanks for reading, if you read. If not, thank you too!**


	4. The second mission and the Nordics

The team went back to the cute cafe, the Panda Panda Land. They all sat on the same places as they did before, England on the far left, America beside him, then France, China, Russia. On the other side, there was Seborga, Romano, and Feli, who started doodling on the table with mustard. The nations were all tired, and happy that they had succeeded on their first lame mission.

"So where the bloody hell is Switzerland?" Arthur said, while sipping a bit of his Earl Grey. "Why isn't he here with us?"

"He isn't going to be with us. He's just giving us guns and ammo and other fucking things." Romano took out his phone. "It's boss. I think he's giving us a thing to do…. Damn." The angry Italian answered the phone and put it on speaker, so everyone could hear. "Hello."

"_Romano. You guys have another….uh….misson_?"

"Mission, basta- ugh, sir."

_ "Oh, yes. Okay. So this time, you will have to kill-"_

_ "_FUCK YEA_" _America, Russia and Romano got excited with the news. Maybe too excited, since America accidentally punched the waitress.

_ "A cat." _All the nations and the micro-nation stopped what they were doing, and focused on the Italian boss. "_Uh, ciao_?"

"...A CAT? WHY THE FUCK A CAT? WHY- WHY- A SINGLE SHITTY FUCKING CAT?" Romano screamed in the top of his lungs at the phone, and completely forgot about the kids in the café.

_"Because it's for experience. Romano, although you had killed various times-"_

"Really fratello?" The middle brother asked with his famous puppy eyes.

"I'm fucking Italian." Romano tried to avoid the little bastard's cute pleading eyes before it was too late.

"But I didn't-"

"WHAT-A EVER!"

"…_And the cat is pretty old-"_

_ "_Romano…why did you kill?"

"You know why!"

_"…It keeps pooping all around and-"_

"Ve~are you-"

"Yes. Yes I am."

"…_And that's why its penis is weird."_

"Whatever, boss. So where is this cat?"

"_You are at Switzerland now, right_? _It's pretty close. It's in Germany."_

"AWE HELL NO!"

"_Romano. You are the leader, no_? _You go too."_

"Shit…"

"_Oh yes, and I forgot. You need a team name."_

"Uh yea." Romano looked across the table, and saw the bunch of idiots that he was with. America, who made airplanes out of the napkin, England, who was drinking his 3rd cup of tea, France, who was flirting with waitresses and waiters, China, who was snuggling with the panda chair, Russia, who was looking at a weird world map that only had Russia on it, Seborga, who was trying to flirt with as many people as possible, and Feliciano, who was now doodling with Ketchup. "Ugh….what about The Idiot Team Squad?"

"_..."_

_ "..."_

_"So you're TITS_? _Pfff...ok."_

"Oh, mon ami! It's perfect!" The French twiddled around and took out a rose out of nowhere then gave it to the 15th waitress that he flirted with today.

"Uh…YEAH YEA WHAT-A EVER. Now let's go kill that cat."

**Divide~**

The TITS managed to get into Germany, and spotted the single cat on the street, who was licking his private parts.

"Hey. Flag Idiot. You go."

"Ve~But Romano I don't wanto~"

"Just go!"

"But Romano-"

"JUST FUCKING GO!" Feliciano yelped and ran off towards the old cat in the middle of the street. "Kill it fast and let's go."

"Ve~" Feliciano took out a knife and started pointing it towards the little cat, who was staring at Feliciano with a blank face. He then proceeded to touch the blade on the cat.

"What are you doing? YOU'RE POKING THE DAMN CAT AND NOT STABBING IT!"

"But fratello-"

"KILL IT! KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT" Romano spat as he screamed for the 20th time today.

"Ahh! Ok!"

"Feli?" A blonde german approached the frightened Italian as he carried a potato sack. "Vhat are you doing here?"

"Eeek! Ludwig! Ludwig! Help! Can you kill the cat here?"

"But vhy-"

"Pleaaaseee?" Germany sighed and got the knife right off Feliciano's hand.

"Fine." Germany stabbed the cat quickly and let the knife stay in its body for a couple of seconds before taking it out. "Happy?" Ludwig looked over his shoulders and saw the small Italian crying over the cat. "HUH? Hey Feliciano! Vhy are you crying- Hey!"

"Damn you, potato bastard! Feliciano was supposed to kill the cat!" Romano went over to the confused blonde and took the cat to put it in a trash bin. "Why did you kill it?"

"Vhat? But-"

"Yea, fuck you. Feliciano, let's go. We're done here."

"Hey! But-"

"Bye, potato man!" Ludwig stood there, with the what-the-fuck-happened face for a couple of seconds before shaking his head and getting back on track again, as he was doing before he got interrupted and confused as hell. On the other hand, the oldest Italian called his boss. "Hey. Boss. We killed the cat."

"_Pfff….you actually did_? _I was just kidding but ok...HAHAHHA"_

_ "_WHAT- WHAT-A WHAT?"

"_Okay bye~"_

_"_Hey wait! Wait you!" His dear boss had already hung up, and Romano tossed his phone on the ground. Thankfully, it didn't break, or else he would have to buy another phone for the third time this month. "How dare he-"

As Romano cussed in English, Itaian and Spanish, and then commanded the other TITS members to follow him. The team went to Rome, Italy, where the two older Italians lived together. The nations decided that they would stay there for a period of time, until they were done with all their missions.

"So why do you think we had to make a mafia team, aru?" The Chinese man sat on the floor, as a custom and studied the house in every detail.

"Che palle…I don't really know. But there must be a real reason. Although my boss is as immature as shit, he is kind of smart. Sometimes."

"Hahahaha! But dude! Our team isn't really like a mafia team! It's like…It's like…just a team!"

"Yeah, I know. But we do have a purpose…. We don't know it yet." The men stayed in silence, trying to think what the purpose was. They got nowhere, so they just started watching EURO. It was Germany vs Italy. Italy was winning, and the Italian trio cheered with all their might.

Meanwhile, in Germany…

"WHAT ZE HELL? VHY CAN'T THEY DEFEND TO THEIR OWN GOOD? SHEISSE! FUCK! WE CANNOT LOSE THIS! NO! NOT AGAIN!" The German threw his beer can at the giant tv screen, while his older brother, Prussia, gobbled up the remaining beer cans.

Meanwhile in Italy….

"YAY!"

Meanwhile in Germany…

"FUCK!"

**Divide~**

A little bit up there…

"Hey Norge! Did you hear that the Italies and the Allies joined to form a team or something?" The Danish smiled brightly as he took out a beer from the refrigerator and drank it. "I wonder why they didn't invite us…." Denmark pouted as he stated the last comment.

"Probably because they didn't like us or something." The serious Norwegian said as he practiced some magic in the living room.

"It kind of makes me mad. They always exclude us from things." Iceland, who was playing with Mr. Puffin looked at his neighbors and crossed his arms, pouting a little bit. "Why do they never invite us in things?"

"Oh, I'm sure they just forgot or something!" The Finnish smiled sweetly and patted Iceland on the back. "Don't be sad, it's alright!"

"H's r'ght. D'n b' s'd." The Swedish stared at Iceland with his serious face, which frightened the poor grey haired man.

"Hey, we should like punish them or something! For not inviting us! How about we mess up their plans by distracting them every time?" Denmark gulped his third beer as he waited for a response.

"You're too stupid to be able to do that." Norway stopped talking to his troll and walked towards the tall Danish man.

"Hey! You want to bet? I could so distract them!"

"Hah, how? With your fat body?"

"You know damn well that I am not fat! I am buff like a bull!"

"Bulls are fat."

"No they are not!"

"They love Spain's ass."

"Well his ass is pretty fine."

"See?"

"Anyways! Let's bet! Let's see who is the better distractor! I try to distract Romano, you try to distract England! Ice distracts Seborga, Finny distracts Feli, and Sweden distracts France! The winner gets to do whatever they want with the losers!"

"B't wh't ab't Am'ric', Russ'a n'd Ch'na?"

"Uh…..Hey! Call Korea, Hong Kong and Japan!"

"Oh God." Norway proceeded to call the three Asians, who agreed immediately. "Okay. They're in. Korea gets America, Hong Kong gets China and Japan gets Russia."

"Alright! I'm going to make you guys my slaves!" Denmark got his axe and went to the door. "Oh, and Norge, you will be my really personal slave." Mathias winked at the shocked and disgusted Norwegian and went in the car. " Well see you guys soon!" He then drove to a liquor store to buy some beer and called his boss for information about the other team.

**Divide~**

"A dance party?" The TITS asked in unison at the phone as they heard the News.

_"Yes. All the nations are going to be there, including you guys, but you have another purpose to go there. The host of the dance is Canada. Do not ask 'who'. Canada, the 2__nd__ biggest country, America's brother. But he's on top. Don't laugh. Anyways. We need him. But you guys have to capture him and bring him to me. Don't ask why, but we just need him. Don't make it noticeable. Good luck."_ The boss hung up, and left the nations to think.

"Ugh. The dance is tomorrow, at noon. We just finished to do two missions, and I'm sure you guys are tired. Let's just sleep and think about it tomorrow." Marcello stretched along with Feliciano and slept the second he was done talking.

"Alright, let's all sleep, you wankers."

"Good night, aru."

"Ohohohohon~"

"You know what, Romano, you sleep beside the bloody frog."

"Hell no! I won't let him rape me!"

"Well, me neither!"

"If you don't sleep right now, I will rip off your penises, da?" The nations quickly fell asleep while covering their private parts, specially France.

**WOOOOOOOOO I'M ON A ROLL TODAY.**

**I managed to upload 4 chapters! Yey! Now, now, what do I have to say now...  
**

**...  
**

**Uh...Oh yes, the Nordics appear, and I have to say, I LOVE the Nordics! Oh, and personally, I wanted Germany to win, but Italy won, but Congrats, Italy! But Spain won, so Congrats Spain! Okay. Wow nothing comes to my mind right now. Uh, I think the story is finally developing now. Finally. Alright! Oh, and by the way, English is not my first language, so yea. Bear with me! Bye. :)  
**


	5. The dance

As all the nations arrived at the dance party, the TITS all gathered around in one group, and got ready for their third mission; kidnapping Canada. The ball room was astonishing, there was soft light everywhere, the waiters and waitresses would dance on their way to serve someone, and if you looked above, there was a painting of angels. Although the TITS looked for Canada all the time, they couldn't find the invisible nation.

"Where the fuck is that guy?" Romano took Belgium's hand as he mumbled some curses and danced along with the beautiful nation. To tell you the truth, Romano was nervous as hell. He always had a crush on Belgium since he was a kid, and every time he saw her, his weird strand of hair would suddenly…dance. Just like South Korea's. "Uh…it's a beautiful night, huh?" He attempted to lighten up the tense atmosphere between the two nations.

"Oh, yes, it is indeed." The blonde girl smiled sweetly as she tilted her head. "You know, I think we should separate now."

"Huh, but why?"

"Hm...look at my brother..." Romano glanced over Belgium's shoulder, and saw Netherlands, her brother, staring at him with a glare that could burn him to ashes.

"Ah! Okay! Bye Bella!" Romano took off and tried to hide from Netherlands's deadly stare, and ended up bumping on Prussia.

"Kesesese…..look who is here….vhy, vhy, do you want ze awesome me, now? I zought you were with Spain." The albino turned over to the oldest Italian and took a sip of his beer. "Oh, I see. You finally see that I am ze most awesome nation in ze world!"

"First of all, I am not with Spain. Get the hell over with it. Second, you aren't even a nation! And third, WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT YOU?"

"Kesesesesese...WHO VOULDN'T VANT ME? I. AM. AWESOME. Oh, by ze way, did you see little Canada? I vould like to talk to him…"

"No. I didn't see him. I'm actually looking for him too."

"Hm? Wow...Now you're going for Canada? Quite ze playboy, huh?" Romano blushed and kicked Prussia in the….uh….his birdie. "OW! NO! MY 5 METERS! YOU! YOU! ARE YOU JEALOUS?"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, BASTARD! I'M GOING."

"Wait- going where?" South Italy just ignored the silver haired man and proceeded to look for Canada. But as he walked across the ball room, he danced and danced with various nations, some who are like gods in dancing, and some who were really bad. When Lovino (ROMANO, GODDAMMIT!) finally got to where Feliciano and Seborga were, he was dead tired and his feet were throbbing,

"Ve~Are you ok, Romano?"

"I am fine. Did you guys see Canada today?"

"No…" Seborga said, as he looked down on his drink. "But there are some really pretty girls here….like Taiwan, Vietnam, man Hungary is really fine, Ukraine and her…gifts, Li is cute, Belarus….if she wasn't scary as hell, I would go out with her. Seychelles is alright, but just a one-night stand. Naw just kidding, she is too young for me. And Wy….Damn….HEY! WY!" Seborga went off to his dear 'friend' micro-nation, leaving his older brothers by themselves.

"Ve~ I think our little brother is in love~" Feliciano giggled while Romano just growled.

"At least he's straight."

"No….he had some men underwear, remember?" Romano looked at Feliciano with his eyes wide open, and then realized that he indeed had some. "Besides, you love Spain, don't you? You're gay yourself~" Feliciano giggled once again, but quickly ran away from his angry brother., who was blushing madly.

_I don't feel good doing this….Just like the other time with the cat…what is the boss planning_? Feliciano thought as he ran off from Romano, then shook off the bad feeling in his gut.

**Divide~**

On the other side of the ball room, England, France and America sat on a table, while looking at the other nations, who were all dancing in one rhythm.

"Where the bloody hell is he…" England crossed his legs as he looked at the entire ball room looking for the little Canadia.

"Say, mon ami. I zink you are having a liking for my little Matthew~" The French raised one of his eyebrows as he gave a rapist's smirk at the Englishman. "It's alright, I accept you two~"

"WHAT? HOW COULD YOU- NO!"

"Wow really, Iggy? I didn't know that..." America's eyes softened as he played with his food on the table. "But it's ok…if you fell that way…"

"WHAT? NO! YOU FROG!" England then strangled the French, as he did constantly, and America broke off the two nations once again.

"Hey! Hey! Wait! Look at that chick!" The three nations looked over to where the American was pointing, and saw a thin woman with a beautiful silhouette walking on the other side of the ball room, alone. She was wearing a pink dress, with flowers from up and down the dress. She was also wearing a tall hat, and her delicate hands went over to pick some sweets. The woman had a long but short blond hair, which would move in majestic movements, and sparkles would leave trace whenever she played with her magical hair. The three nations stayed in awe, then struggled to get to that beautiful woman.

"Oh, hello, my lady, it is such a beautiful night to dance, would you like to dance with the gentleman?" England took the lady's hand, who blushed slightly, but got his hand taken off by a certain French pervert.

"Oh, my beautiful rose, wouldn't you like to dance with ze most romantic nation of ze world? We would certainly have ze greatest time!" France kissed the maiden's hand, who blushed into a deeper shade, but was tackled by a certain burger-loving man.

"Oh, hi! So, do you want to dance with me? I'm really good! Let's dance! C'mon!" The American grabbed the woman's hand tightly, as he dragged her to the dance room.

"Uh, excuse-me, America…"

"Oh, you know my name? Oh yes! What's your name again? I for-"

"Uh, hey, Alfred…"

"You know my real name too? Wow you're amazing! Now tell me yours, I-"

"HEY! SHUT UP!'

The three blondes looked at the sudden mad woman, and finally looked her face with attention. As they saw her real face, they all got up and felt their heart drop.

"Ca…Canada?"

"Oh, mon dieu, how could I ever forget your beautiful face!"

"Oh, dude….sorry. I didn't know-"

"Well, now you know. And anyways…it isn't exactly your fault….I…I was forced to dress up this way…"

"Huh? Why?"

_Flash back_

_ "Hmm...I wonder if I can find Japan here..." Canada opened the door to a sinister house in Japan, and got in slowly and suspiciously. "Wow…it's kind of dark…" He then got deeper into the house by step by step. "Boss told me Japan would be here…" The blonde creeped into another room in the house, with had a faint light inside it. "Hmm…Japan? I'm sorry for the intrusion, but- JAPAN?" He then saw the small nation on the ground, dead drunk. "Hey! Japan! Are you alright? Hey!'_

_ "I...I AM SO UNHAPPY!" The usually quiet nation threw his arms around the blonde, and cried over the other's chest. "WHY! WHY!"_

_ "Uh….It's ok….Just tell me what happened. Did you get into a fight with someone?"_

_ "Hic….Hic…No…"_

_ "Economy?"_

_ "Hic...No...But the eggs are too expensive."_

_ "Then why-"_

_ "I MISSED THE ANIME CONVENTION!" Canada looked at Japan's sad face, and remembered how he and America resembled a lot when upset. They would cry over the stupid things, and not the serious ones._

_ "The….the..anime convention?"_

_ "YESSS...HIC...WHAT NOW? WHAT NOW? PREASE, PREASE HERP ME !"_

_ "Ho- How?"_

_ "Dress up! Cosplay! Make me happy!"_

_ "But I have a dance-"_

_ "I WILL KIR MYSERF!"_

_ "OKAY!"_

_ End of Flashback_

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"That's the reason?"

"Yes..."

"HAHAHAHAHA! DUDE WHAT THE HECK! HAHAHAHAHA! DID YOU TAKE PICTURES?"

"No..."

"Awe..." The three blondes got their hopes down as they desired those pictures a lot.

"Well anyways, dude, let's go." America put Canada on his shoulder as the four blondes walked out of the dance party.

"WAIT! WHERE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

"Kidnapping you." Alfred grinned at his brother as he sped up, almost making Matthew throw up. Matthew's mind stopped, and was suddenly filled with perverted things.

"Wait. Wait. Why? And why is France going too?"

"Ohohohohon~ You'll see." France grinned at Matthew as he took out a rose to pin it o nthe frightened nation's hair.

"-"

**Divide~**

"Hm. Hey boss. We got your Canada here. I'm sending him to you."

"_Alright. Thanks Romano."_

"Uh, hey. Why do you need Matthew?"

"…_Because he's a great cook!"_

"…..WHAT?"

"_Okay bye~"_

_ "_WAIT YOU! YOU!" His boss had turned off the phone once again, leaving the angry Italian to cuss at his phone.

**Divide~**

"Hm. Sir, why don't you tell him?" A tall man with black hair asked the Italian boss across his desk. "Shouldn't they at least know what you are planning to do?"

"Oh, if he knew what I am planning to do, he wouldn't accept to do these things… He probably thinks I'm doing in for the nation or something. Hah. Romano can be too kind and dumb like Feliciano sometimes." The Italies' boss grinned evilly as he turned to the chained Canadian. "Oh, Canada. Do you wonder why you are here?"

Canada looked frightened at the boss, and started to feel tears on his eyes. He then shook his head, to show that he was paying attention.

"Canada. The land that no one remembers. What a pity, for a nation in which a lot of talent is born. "The boss chuckled as he touched the blonde's cheeks. "But it's okay now. You are going to be of great use to me... Knock him out." As soon as the boss ordered, two big men walked towards the forgotten nation and injected a needle on his arm. "Sleep well. You'll need it."

**Okay. Chapter 5.**

**Oh thanks lunynha for reviewing! I love her fanfics! For anyone who is reading this, you should her hers!  
**

**Oh yes, I forgot to say, uh, this is my first fanfiction...That's why it probably sucks. But oh well. I'm having fun here, kidnapping Canada.  
**

**Hmmm...Ah! Canada tried to cosplay as Ciel Phantomhive, but failed at it. But it made Japan happy. He didn't kill himself.  
**

**For anyone who is reading this, I hope you're enjoying it! :)  
**

**Oh, and since I like Italy's boss, (In this fanfic.) I was thinking if I should give him a name.**

**I think I'll probably decide by tomorrow! Alright bye now.  
**


	6. Norway's confession

At the following day, the five Nordics were at their house, some trying to kill one and some trying to avoid that from happening.

"We missed the dance because of you!" The usually quiet and calm Norwegian grabbed the Danish by his tie, strangling him. "And we couldn't even prevent that team from succeeding their whatever mission was!"

"Norway, please calm down. You aren't like this usually, what happened?" Finland tried to seperate the two.

"I lost the opportunity to see England because of-" Norway paled as he realized what he had just said. "Uh, I…" He let go of the Danish and tried to run away, but was retained by a certain Finnish and Sweden.

"Ha…Our Norge is in love~" Finland gave a cocky smile and ordered Sweden to hold Norway. "And with England…Now, now, you better tell me what is going on between you two~" Finland faced the blushing nation as he sat in front of him, along with the other two.

"Big brother…and England? I thought you were with Den." Iceland caressed Mr. Puffin as he tried to hide a smile.

"I…Uh…" Norway heavily blushed as he saw the four looking at him. "I.."

"You are awfully red, Norway…" Finland was enjoying every moment of this. He secretly loved pairing people up, and wouldn't let go of any possibility. "NOW TELL ME, SINCE WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?" The Finnish got desperate to know about his neighbor's love story.

"F'nl'd. C'lm D'wn." The Sweden, who was currently pinning the Norwegian down on the sofa, eyed his wife with curiosity. "Y're diff'r'nt y'rself. Wh't h'pp'nd?" Finland blushed as he realized he was too excited, and put on his sweet smile.

"Oh, I am just excited that our Norway is going to get a boyfriend~" Meanwhile, Denmark was chugging on his beer, too hurt to say anything.

"I am not. Besides, he is always with that French or American. He will never notice me." Norway looked down to his feet as he said what has been in his mind for years.

"Hey! Don't worry! We won't let this happen! Leave it all to us!" Finland started to dial on his phone as he jumped in excitement.

"What…What are you going to do?" Norway glanced at the hyper Santa, slightly worried, as he knew of the Finnish tactics of….love.

"Oh, I'm calling England so we mark a date for ya-" Finland got tackled on the floor by his recent love victim, that eventually led into a fight between the five Nordics in the room.

**Meanwhile, outside of the Italians' house…**

"WAIT! YOU! YOU!" Romano glared at his phone, as he screamed some more cusses at it. "WHAT THE- YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN FRANCE OR SOMETHING! DAMN!"

"Hey… Are you ok?" Seborga tapped his older brother on his shoulder, as he licked his Popsicle. "Why are you screaming at your phone?" _Lick. "_Again?"

"Well, the fucking bastard made-" Romano turned around to see his brother full view. "THE FUCK ARE YOU WEARING?" He then scanned his youngest brother up and down. Marcello was wearing a potato costume.

"Huh? Oh this? Ok I'll tell you the story."

_Flash back_

_ It was a beautiful night. I was at the ball room-_

"Know what? I don't give a fuck." Romano walked away, leaving his youngest brother whine and complain about not hearing his amazing story.

**Meanwhile, inside…**

"Ve~ I am pretty sure that the boss is planning something…Something really bad…" Feliciano walked around his house, biting his nails, as a custom he does when he is thinking. Which is rare. "I better tell the others…." The Italian got interrupted by his thoughts as a Russian called his name. "Hm? Did you call me, Russia?" He then turned around to see the big man waving in front of him.

"Yes, China says the food is ready." The violet eyes disappeared into the kitchen as he went to help his Chinese friend, earning a shriek from the man.

"Okay!" The Italian bounced to the kitchen, and ate the delicious Chinese food, forgetting what he was going to tell them.

**Later, outside…**

Marcello ate the last bit of his Popsicle furiously, after what happened between him and Romano. He then threw the stick in a nearby trash bin. _At least he respected the earth. _

"Damn! It was a pretty good story too…" Marcello sat on a bench nearby, and looked at his brother's back garden. "I should have said that-" The micro-nation's phone vibrated in his pocket, surprising the boy. "God…WHO IS IT?" Seborga screamed at the phone, just like the oldest of the trio would.

_"Hello? Seborga? It's your boss~" _

"Huh? Oh. What." Marcello already got bored as Feliciano would if somebody talked about politics with him.

"_Okay! So I need you to come to me."_

"Huh? Why?" The not amused nation focused more on his nails than to his boss.

_"I…uh…I just need you right now. Oh and don't tell your fratello about this!" _

"Wait. Why." Marcello leaned to his phone, getting curious all of the sudden. "Why do you need me."

_"I…uh…It's important so just come_. " The Italian's boss then proceeded to tell the address and attempt to make the micro-nation to go to him. "_PLEASE__?"_

"No."

_"Please?"_

"No."

The conversation went on for about twenty minutes until Seborga finally gave up. "Alright! Fine! It better be something good." Seborga pouted as he trotted down to the boss's house. "At least it's close by."

"Y_AY! Bye_~" The Italian trio waited anxiously for the potato-dressed micro-nation.

**Inside, again.**

The American, Englishman and the French were currently watching the Harry Potter marathon at the Italians' living room, after eating with China, Russia and N. Italy, who were now outside.

"Whaat? He's Lord Voldemort?" The American found himself amazed by the turn of events. "Daaamn…Can we do that with our names?" The American got excited just by the thought of his name having a double-message. "Let's see! Let's see!"

"No, it is bloody stupid, wanker." Britain crossed his legs as he attempted to focus on the movie once again.

"Oh, come on, Arthur, the movie is terrible anyways…" The French whipped his hair as he went to grab three pens and some papers.

"What? This-"

"Okay. Let's do this." The French was back with the utensils, and the American went right on to work on his name. England followed shortly after, since he had known what would happened next in the movie, since he watched all of them 15 times.

"I'll just wait for you guys. I am too lazy to do on mine." France closed his eyes and went to the Dreamland.

It took twenty minutes for him to come back to real life. "Hey! Wake up, frog!" England threw a pillow at the sleeping French, who cursed under his breath.

"What…did you find something out?" France rubbed his eyes as he saw the pile of used papers the duo threw around. "Must have been a hard time, huh?"

"Shut up…And yes, we did find something out." America shyly showed his paper to France, and avoided the green eyed man, who was barely holding out a laughter.

"Lemme see….Alfred F. Jones, a.k.a.…. Loners Fed Jaf?" The French broke into a laughter along with the British, which made the American even more embarrassed. "Who is Jaf?"

"I…I dunno! Iggy, you have to show him yours!" The Englishman stopped laughing as he blushed and handed his crumbled paper to the French.

"Now…Arthur Kirkland…I can't read your hand writing, could you say it for me?" England got offended and snatched the paper off the blonde, and cleared his throat before he said.

"….Arrr…think lad, Uk." England blushed as he saw the snickering American, whose eyes were teary from holding his laughing. He turned to see the French's reaction, which was confusion.

"Why are you acting like a pirate? I do realize that you miss those days but-"

"I am not acting like a pirate! It's just…that's what I came up with!" France stared at the blushing British as he realized.

"Really? Wow you must be a pirate by blood, England! And you even have UK in your name! I like it!" The other two stared at the French with amusement, surprised at the reaction.

"You…you really like it?" England started to fill up with joy, relieved that his old "friend" didn't make fun of him. "You really do?"

"Ohon. No. I think it is really cheesy." France broke out with laughter with the American this time, making England cuss more than usual at the two.

"Shut your bloody trap, wine frog! What about your fucking name, huh?"

"Hm…Francis Bonnefoy….Can…Yo Boner Sin-" Francis's eyes lightened up as he realized how his name reflected him.

"You know what, stop. I am not surprised that your name has such…things." Before any of the three could say anything. England's phone buzzed. "Hm? Finland? What does he want?" England put his phone on his year as he answered. "Hello, Finland? Why did you ca-"

"_England! England! Norway-" _England heard a thumping sound on the other side of the line. "_Norway- you-"_

"Huh? Finland, is everything alright? What about Norway?"

"_Norway, he, you- Sve, hold him!"_

"Uh…"

"_Norway- likes-"_

_ "_Likes who? Am I okay to know this?"

"_Of Course! Norway loves y-" _He then heard another screaming voices along with the Finnish, and raised his eyebrows to hear some cusses from the usually reserved Norwegian.

"Uh...I think it's better to call another time-"

"_NO! UH, MEET ME AT THE USUAL HOTEL TOMORROW, AT THREE! YOU KNOW, THE ONE BY THE CONFERENCE_? YEA? TOMORROW BY THREE! BYE!" Before England could respond, the Finnish had already hung up, leaving the confused nation wondering what had just happened.

"Hey, everything alright?" America looked over his shoulder, as he devoured the hamburger on his hand.

"Uh…Yea…I just have to meet with Finland tomorrow, that's all." England sat on the other side of the room, still confused about the conversation he had with the Finnish. "Weird…We don't usually talk much. And he was saying about Norway liking someone…" The green-eyed man furrowed his eyebrows, trying to link everything Finland said over the phone, but failed at it as France groped his ass. "Argh! What are you doing, frog!"

"Oh, mon ami, how about we have some fun…We are all bored…" France purred as he got closer to the Englishman.

"WHAT? America is here and-"

"We could have a threesome, I don't mind~"

"THE FUCK! GET OFF ME, CHEESE-BREATH!"

"Oh, England, Can Yo Boner Sin~"

"SHUT UP!"

**Back to Seborga**

"Huh? Fuck! Let go of me!" Seborga wiggled to get away from the two men who were dragging him into a dark room.

"Oh, I am sorry, Marcello, but we just had to do this….It's for your brothers' sake…" The boss followed the dragging micro-nation as he smiled slightly. "Don't worry. It won't hurt much~... Strip him."

"Yes sir."

"WHAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN STRIP- LEMME GO!" Seborga half-cried half-screamed as the two men worked on his potato costume.

"Oh, and don't forget to take a picture."

"GET OFF ME, YOU PERVERTED BASTARDS! WHY WOULD YOU TAKE A DAMN PICTURE-"Seborga's voice was silenced as the door closed, leaving him and the two men inside of the cold and dark room.

**Okay, please read :  
**

**I didn't really edit this chapter, so it is. Probably bad. Oh yes, I am very sorry about the confusion about the transitions in the previous chapters! Sorry! And lemme see...Oh yes! Thank you very very much for reading this, I really appreciate it! I won't be bugging you to review or anything, so don't worry! Oh, and thank you for the faves, and alerts! It means so much to me :D Oh, and yes, I do realize that France's "second" name is lacking ff, but yea, well.  
**

**Oh, and sorry if you didn't like England with Norway please don't kill me! And yes, I do realize there isn't much of love scenes in my story, because, well, first, I kind of suck at them, and second, I didn't really think about doing them while writing. But I'll probably have some fluff in the next chapter, if you don't mind.  
**

**Thank you so much for readin this~I love you! (This is my first fanfic, ever.) See you in the next chapter?  
**


	7. Please Read

Hello, please read this!

Okay, so as most of the people that read this fanfic probably know, I publish new chapter very frequently…But I was just writing because I suddenly felt a spark of inspiration. And creativity. And now, I have none. No ideas! Seriously. Soooo….It will probably take a lot of time for me to update the next, until I find myself courage to write again, and I'll wait for an invisible unicorn to give me magical inspiration for me to write another chapter.

**So in short, I will not update as soon as I would like, or maybe forever.**

Well, not forever,

Well maybe. I dunno. **Just wish me luck with the Mr. Unicorn.**

Uh…Oh yes! I'm sorry for not replying, I didn't see the anonymous reviews. Dx

Ayumi Kudou Thank you! Yes. As you probably know by now, my story is completely random and makes no sense. (**Another reason why I think I won't write soon, I dunno where this is going myself.)**

And someone asked me about Seborga being the Italy bros' cousin, hm, I made him a recently adopted brother, I'm sorry if you didn't like it I just wanted the trio together. I like trios. I like 3. :D But I'm really sorry if you didn't like it. I appreciate your comment, tho! (And thanks for reading like 5 times, I love you! xD)

Anyways, because I talk(In this case, write) too much, and go on different subject randomly, I will stop. Hm, thank you for all of you guys who were reading this, I really appreciate it! I hope Mr. Unicorn visits me soon!


End file.
